Posts Tagged ‘vampires’

mollyharper

 

This book had me laughing out loud more than any book I have read in a long long time!

Jane Jameson, not to be confused with adult film star Jenna Jameson, is from the Hollow. A small, sleepy little town in the good ol’ south.

south

She is a librarian with a thirst for useless trivia…and a soon to be thirst for blood. After getting fired from her beloved job as a librarian and then being mistaken for a deer and shot on her way home, Jane awakes to find herself a new addition to the undead of Half Moon Hollow.

shocker

She has a hot and cold relationship with her sire Gabriel–SWOON

meow

And lots of run-ins with the local undead inhabitants… and SOMEBODY is trying to pin vampire murders on dear sweet Jane

what-in-the

This book wasn’t the best book I have ever read but if you are looking for a book to give you a nice little giggle fit, this is a good fit for you!

cute_happy

Some of my FAV quotes:

“I am your sire. I am to guide you through your first days as a vampire. Your first feeding is a rite of passage, a sacrament. It will not be wasted on some hormone-driven frenzy. This is why I wanted you to feed from me.”
“I will not drink it in a house, I will not drink it with a mouse. I will not drink it
here or there, I will not drink it anywhere,” I wheezed, hoping I was able to communicate adequate sarcasm through the crippling belly cramps.
“Did you just quote Green Eggs and Ham?”

-Jane and Gabriel

funny

“A woman puts on a new dress eyeliner lip gloss to please others. A woman paints her toes to please herself. And if there was one thing I was familiar with it was pleasing…There’s no way to finish that sentence without embarrassing myself.”

-Jane

YOWZA

“Note to self: Try to stop reacting to surprises like a cartoon character.”
Jane Jameson”

-Jane

cookie

“Walmart started selling “Vampire Home Defense Kits”, including holy water, crosses, stakes, mallets, and a book of quick blessings to bar vampires from your door. The fact that these kits were generally useless didn’t bother me nearly as much as the idea of holy water being sold at Walmart.”

-Jane

oh-brother

“Wait, Richard Cheney, as in Dick Cheney? You’re a vampire named Dick Cheney? Somehow, that makes you seem more evil.”

-Jane

hehe

Jane Jameson.”
He grinned. “Like the porn star.”
I gaped at him. “What? No, Jane Jameson.”
“Oh, not as fun,” he said, making disappointed clucking noises.”

-Dick Cheney (the vampire)

rawr

Overall, I give this 3/5 stars. An enjoyable read but nothing too spectacular

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